There is no doubt that one sure way to improve self-confidence
is to model highly self-confident people. Self-confidence is all about believing in yourself, your own worth, your power and abilities, regardless of the situation you are in.A lot of people believe that self-confidence comes from the possession of high skill sets or knowledge. While being excellent in a particular area of expertise can give you a sense of high self-worth, it is not a necessarily a prerequisite for self-confidence.People who have high self-confidence have a strong sense of assurance and belief in themselves. They exude calmness, composure and self-awareness, and that is because, they have formed a set of habits that have become part of who they are and how they live their life.
So, let’s look at these habits in more detail:Keep Your Word – To Yourself And Others.This sounds very simple – but often it isn’t.For example, how often do you tell yourself you’re going to do something and then you don’t, like exercise perhaps? How often do you NOT keep your promise to others? Whenever this happens, not only is there an underlying feeling of dissatisfaction within yourself but also you are providing your subconscious mind with evidence that you don’t do what you say you will… that you are someone whom can not be trusted.
You can include a good grade, a great game, an award you won, succeeding at something that was difficult or working hard to master a task or to finish a difficult project. One of my patients loved to remind himself of how he felt when he learned to surf. Another, like to revisit his best basketball games.A swimmer I worked with like to take herself back to her best times and to the meets where she touched the wall first at the end of the race.
Tactic Five: Give and receive compliments. Do you feel special when someone gives you a beautiful compliment about yourself? Do you think you make others feel good about themselves when you give them wonderful compliments about themselves? Hopefully your answer to both questions would be yes. People want and need to feel special. Practice giving compliments on a daily basis and soon the favor will be returned upon yourself.We must not allow bad circumstances whether they be past or present to effect our daily lives. Improve your self-esteem to make a better you. We all tarry along in this life with many challenges and gaining a conscious grasp on who you are and learning to love yourself will assist you in building self-esteem. Better self-esteem equals better results in your life.
And, the next time you go out on the field or on the court, carry some of these thoughts with you and see if you start to feel more relaxed, confident and focused with this new frame of mind.Everyone knows that women are attracted to confidence. So, a great way to attract women is to increase your self-confidence.
When you’re in public and you see a very beautiful woman on the arm of a man who is plainly way out of her league, it’s probably because he’s the one who’s had the guts to ask her out.One of my favourite sayings is – “Women go out with men who ask them”. Now this doesn’t mean that a woman will just go out with any old weirdo who hits on her, but that you’re not going to get a woman if you don’t ask her out. And often you’ll be surprised at the results.
Be Courageous.Get out of your head and just do it.Low self-confident people tend to procrastinate and worry. They end up being hung up over negative outcomes and failures of the past, and they can’t seem to find the courage to move forward.Highly self-confident people have learned that in order to succeed, they can create the possibility of being courageous anytime they want… this way, even if they are afraid, they can choose to take action… in spite of fear!
When doing something for the first time, imagine that you have already done it. Close your eyes, then, vividly imagine you succeeding at what you are planning to do for the first time. The mind does NOT know the difference between something VIVIDLY imagined and something real. Make it vivid by involving all 5 senses.
Find someone who is already confident in the area of expertise you need and watch how they do it. Model as many of their behaviors, attitudes, values, and beliefs for the context you want to be confident in. How can you do this? Talk with them if you have access to them. If you don’t have access to them, get as much exposure to them as you can. This could be talking to people who know the person and/or buying their products if they have some.
Heartfelt gratitude is a much deeper feeling. It is a feeling of appreciation and connection with life itself, which when present, gratitude triggers positive feedback loops.This is the secret habit that high self-confidence people rely on to get access to this amazing positive mental attitude that they have.So, to improve self-confidence start the habit of being grateful.An exercise you can do everyday is to spend 5 minutes acknowledging the small things you like about yourself, things that make you feel self-confident and successful right now.You can write these down in a gratitude journal and review them weekly.
Project yourself into the future and ask if what you’re faced with is as onerous as you fear. This might be a bit morbid and yet this works tremendously well. Imagine yourself on your deathbed looking back over your life. You are surrounded by your friends and family. You’re reviewing your life. Is what you’re faced with now even going to pop up? That’s highly unlikely. Keeping things in proper perspective really diminishes fear.Remember that you lose out on 100% of the opportunities that you never go for. Nothing ventured-Nothing gained. To get what you want, ask for it. If you consistently ask people for what you want, you will get it. As you think about your goals and what you are striving for, how effective would it be for you to believe that several people out there want to and would be willing to help you if you only ask? People will help because they know they might need help in the future and you might be a source. Whether that is true or not in the “real world” is irrelevant. The belief is empowering, I invite you to adopt it.